Summer Part 3

Day 338  Time to get all my debt under control!  Typed up a list of my smallest debts and came up with a plan of how pay them off A.S.A.P.!  I printed it off and put it in a place where I'd see it often to help remind me to be financially responsible and get free!

Day 339  Ever since I joined the church choir, one of the older women who I've become friends with has been inviting me to various art shows/galleries that include her artwork.  Today I finally went!  When I left, I felt like I'd walked through a journey of my soul.  Each artist had included a typed description of the inspiration and process behind their piece, and it brought the artwork alive and left me totally inspired to live and to create.  I can't even describe how great it felt to call her on the way home and tell her that I'd just gone to see the exhibit...  Maybe it is better to give than to receive!

Day 340  I was beaten down in shame, discouragement, and fear.  Tonight at choir the director/pastor stopped rehearsal to give a short message (which he does sometimes); it was all about fear/worry.  He read several verses about it and then did something that I haven't ever seen him do.  He said, "I want anyone here that is struggling with fear or worry to stand up right now and we're going to pray for you."  Without even taking time to think, I jumped to my feet, and noticed I was the first one up.  Like a ripple effect, people across the choir started to stand.  Tears came as they laid hands on me and prayed.  I ended up sharing my struggles with the woman I described above.  This whole experience showed me the growth that has come through this journey of claiming--more and more, I am seizing moments without debate or hesitation.  I needed this!!!

Day 341  How often have you been driving on a scenic route and just wanted to pull over and take it all in?  I'm sure if you're like me, it's been hundreds of times.  On my journey home to my parents' today, I decided to take the time to take it in; I'd just driven around a curve to find beautiful green hills and fields on my left, grasses and trees lightly swaying.  I pulled the car over to the side of the road, opened my window, and stared, trying to remember that beautiful picture.  Though this probably only last five minutes due to the heat pouring in my window, it was enough to enjoy the serenity that only the beautiful outdoors can bring.

Day 342  A rainy, lazy day at my parents house; the perfect opportunity to escape into a good book!  I decided to lay there all day, guilt-free, and read without letting myself feel like I was wasting the entire day.  This was a big step for me because when I go home I usually feel bad taking time for myself.  I must say: This was wonderful!  Do this!!

Day 343  Tired.  Not feeling social, and especially not feeling like meeting new people and having to make conversation.  You know how it is.  Tonight I was to go to a birthday party for a new girl friend where I knew I wouldn't know anyone.  I was tempted to back out, but knew I needed to claim it and be there for her, especially since there were only going to bve four or five of us there.  I ended up having a bonding conversation with a girl there who is also older and single, having digestion/health issues, and dealing with the stresses of major finanical struggles.  The Lord encouraged me by using me to encourage her.  It was a good reminder that God can and WILL use the struggles we go through for His glory!

Day 344 How many times do we get asked, "How are you?" in a day, and answer with some canned response that totally covers over our true mood or emotional state?  And how many times do we ask someone how they're doing and then not really take the time to find out?  I was presented with this opportunity this morning at church...  Another single girl that I'm getting to know through choir was walking by me, and when I greeted her and asked her how she was, her response did not match the sadness in her face.  I stopped walking, and asked, "Are you sure?  You don't sound like you're okay."  As soon as I said it, her eyes filled with tears and I reached out to hug her.  She shared her struggle with loneliness and just feeling really alone.  I have been there!  I tried to encourage her the best I could and offered my number incase she ever wanted to hang out.  Lord, make me more aware of others and give me Your heart for them!!

Lesson: life is about giving your life away

Summer Part 2

Day 331  Got up the courage to call a stomach specialist (after four years of digestion issues) and schedule an appointment.

Day 332  Something new: After a year at my apartment, I finally invited my sister and her husband over to watch a movie! I usually always go to their place to "get out," but this time they came over; it was super fun to host!

Day 333  Today I decided to be pro-active and get prepared for my upcoming appointment with the stomach specialist. I typed a list of my symptoms, doctor appointments, treatments I've tried, and specific times of pain/bloating.  Better to be over-prepared than not at all!

Day 334  Ever since I found out last year that every Thursday night the local Municipal Band performs a free concert in the park, I've wanted to go.  Tonight I finally did!  I found out that a friend of a friend plays in the band and tonight he was doing a solo.  So, I invited a few girl friends, we brought our camping chairs, and enjoyed the small-town feel of pie/ice cream, families, and music in the park.

Day 335  After our music curriculum meeting today, one of my colleagues (who teaches choir at another middle school in our district) asked me and the other choir director to lunch.  I really wanted to just go home and put my feet up, but I knew that it'd be good to build relationships with them.  I claimed a "yes" and soon was excited about it.  I talked the other choir director into coming and we ended up chatting over Chinese food.  They of course asked about my love life, which could have taken all day to describe, and we chatted about ideas for the upcoming year.  I was actually really glad I went!

Day 336  When I was at the concert in the park on Thursday, they announced that there was to be a special Big Band Concert tonight.  So, I talked my family into going (mom was visiting) and they loved it!  Claim this time?  No checking my cell phone, or the time, for the entire concert.  It was a nice escape!!

Day 337  A friend of our family's was having a surprise 60th Birthday party today and I really wanted to go.  It'd been so long since seeing them, and I thought it'd be something fun and new to do.  My mom just wanted to do something low-key, and the rest of my family wasn't going, so I knew it was up to me if we went.  Sunday afternoon--everyone gets lazy and wants to relax, including me!  But, I mustered up the energy and we went.  It was a fun Hawaiian theme, and like a small reunion.  Plus, I got to see the woman's daughter, a good friend of mine, who I haven't seen in forever!!

Lesson: Don't put things off so long!

School's Out! Part 5

Day 317  My sister called and invited me to lay out at the pool with her, and eventhough I wasn't in the mood to because I wanted to be productive, I found myself choosing time with her and enjoying the sunny weather over accomplishing my "schedule."  I was surprised that the decision was so easy and we ended up having one of the best, most personal convos we've had in a long time.  I noticed afterward that she called me a lot more throughout the week to hang out; it felt nice!   

Day 318  I was lonely.  We'd finished playing sandvolleyball, went to Portillo's with the group, and I just didn't want to be alone.  A certain someone was being distant, I needed people, and I knew I needed to claim the night instead of the mood claiming me.  So, I invited myself over to my sisters to watch a movie--the three of us huddled around the Redbox until we found our selection and then relaxed on the couch for a late-night movie.  By the time I got in bed, I was so tired that I crashed out without the chance of loneliness to  return.

Day 319  There is something totally freeing about cleaning out your wallet, lining your many credit cards (yes, plural) on the kitchen counter, and chopping them up with a shiny pair of scissors.  Debt be gone!!

Day 320  A certain choir girl who I've been trying to reach out to, who doesn't really talk to me at all, totally shocked me--I was one of seven people that she handed an invitation to, inviting us to a free movie at the Hollywood Palms dinner movie theater!  She'd won 8 tickets and wanted to bring ME!  Tonight we went to the movie, and even though I'd already seen it, I kept that to myself and went along for the fun.  It was a blast, and she even hugged me when we left!!

Day 321  Today I experienced the most physical pain I've ever had in my life--severe piercing in my stomach and so much bloating I thought I'd burst.  I stood over the sink, feeling like I was going to throw up, crying and praying for the Lord's help.  I could barely move it was so painful.  No one was around to help me, and I was left to face it alone.  After barely being able to get out, "Help me, Jesus!" I realized I needed to put my mind on Him, not the pain.  I claimed the moment and began to shout thanksgiving and praise to His name as the tears came.  I began to sing worship songs and thank Him for who He is.  I distinctly remember all of a sudden being very aware that HE was there, and He was holding me in His hand, and that was better than any physical person or doctor.  After about 20 or 25 minutes, the pain left.  Little by little, the bloating decreased and the scare was over. 

Day 322  I (finally) mailed out a letter and up-to-date photos of my family and me to a dear elderly lady, my "grandma," I sent a Christmas card to over the holidays.  She'd written back and I had her letter laying on my desk for months, awaiting a much-deserved reply.  Funny, how life gets away from us.

Day 323  My close friends who just got married came to visit.  They are fun, crazy, and goofy all in one!  It was already past 10pm or 11pm and they decided they wanted to get pizza and punch.  I was very tired.  Totally not in the mood to go.  When my sister volunteered to go with them, I knew I needed to claim it instead of being lazy and sitting on the couch staring at the wall or snoozing.  All of us (my sister, brother-in-law, their big dog, my two friends, and I) piled in the little Honda and sped off to SuperWalmart.  We ended up having a blast, as the my friends brought along their new video camera and were narrating the entire experience.  I haven't laughed like that in a long time!!

Lesson:  A claim will not be regretted

The Abyss Part 4 (Days 223-229)

Day 223: Today while visiting my parents I read an entire book in one sitting--I started it in bed and didn't put it down until I finished it at 1:00am; What a wonderful escape!  It was fun to find adventure, suspense, and romance in a novel again.

Day 224: My parents didn't have a lot of money was I was little, so we always had to take super short showers (Yes, my dad would time us!).  My parents no longer have to worry about this, but when I'm home sometimes I still put guilt on myself if my shower seems too long.  Today, still fighting a temperature and achiness, I decided to take a long shower even thought I was at my parents and just enjoy it.  It felt so good!  

Day 225: I don't like confrontation.  By now, you know this!  Today at Kohl's I found an adorable decor pillow for my couch in the exact color and style I've been looking for.  Knowing it would complete my search, and noticing that it was on the "super discount" shelf, I grabbed it.  As I made my way to the counter, I noticed the price was not adjusted on the red tag on the pillow, I mustered up the guts to explain where I'd found it and ask for a deal.  When the cashier typed in a 50% discount, I took a deep breath and reminded her that I'd found it on the 75-80% off shelf and that it had a tiny stain on the corner.  She pused a few buttons and said, "Your total is $6.78"  I couldn't believe it!  It was a $30 pillow.  I left for home swelling with joy and pride that I DID IT!  I took a chance and got a GREAT deal!

Day 226: Today a girl friend invited me to go get pedicures with her and some of her friends, and after double checking with her that the price would not be over $20, I told her to count me in.  My claim came after my toenails were a beautiful fucia color and my friend, who had just paid for her, said "I'm sorry--I guess it's $30!".  Stress.  I felt a tigthening in my heart.  I had told her that I had a coupon at home for another spa that got me a pedicure AND manicure for a total of $30 and she reassured me that the price would be $20.  I took a few deep breaths and claimed a stress-free perspective.  And, when she wanted me to join them for breakfast I decided to lay down my penny pinching for the sake of fellowship and getting to know her friends.  We shared our some of our testimonies and life stories over breakfast.  Thank you, Lord, for helping us see things in a balanced perspective!

Day 227: I love nature. Today I finally made it to the store and bought a hard-core bird feeder for the blossoming tree outside my kitchen window.  I filled it and waited expectantly for my first visitors.

Day 228: Somtimes it's hard to be vulnerable.  Tonight I had dear friends come visit from Milwaukee--a couple that I haven't seen in almost a year!  Sitting across the patio table at one of my favorite restaurants, a moment of truth came up.  I knew I needed to be honest and vulnerable about where I'm at with singleness and my present struggles.  It opened up a very encouraging personal conversation that gave me renewed hope and inspiration!  After they left, I kept thinking how glad I was that I just opened up and laid my sould bare.

Day 229: My cell phone rang and I just didn't feel like answering.  I had gotten home from work shortly before and was just sitting down to eat a snack and relax.  After a few rings I knew I needed to claim the moment, so picked up with a chipper "hello."  Little did I know the blessing on the other end.  One of the youth kids that I've mentored and been friends with for several years began, through choked back tears, to express his thanks for my guidance and help all these years.  He had simply called to say thank you!  I was so glad I'd answered his call!!

Lesson: just go for it--what are you waiting for?

Day 136 Crashing a Guys' Night Out

Saturday night. No plans.
Did NOT want to be home alone.
Why is it so hard to be alone after being with people all break?
Sometimes I don't mind it, but all of you singles can probably relate:
being alone on a weekend night can bring loneliness and discouragement.

Just as I was starting to think, "What in the world am I going to do?!"

one of my guy friends called me up.  He invited me and one of my friends to join

him and his friend at Buffalo Wild Wings.  If you're a guy, you probably know why:  UFC.  Ladies, this stands for "Ultimate Fighting Champion." ;)
Of course I could care less about watching men punching each other and rolling around on the ground, but it was really fun to go do something different.  The place was packed, the energy level was high, and the food was great!  My girl friend and I talked about life, the Lord, and her new love interest and had a lot of laughs and encouragement.  The waiter gave us our drinks free, and we had a heart-to-heart with one of our guy friends who is trying to overcome a drug addiction.

I returned home feeling blessed for friendships and reminded of God's faithfulness to me.

Lesson: it's not "crashing" a guys night if you're invited!
 

Day 133 Just GO!

Do you ever make plans,

and then get tired or lazy and just want to break them?
As a teacher, I'm still on vacation,
(Sorry to everyone who is already back at work!)
and when I'm on break,
I switch back and forth between "seizing the moment"
and just wanting to laze around and do absolultey NOTHING.

My friends and I made plans to go bowling tonight:

8:00pm, Brunswick Zone.

But then two people backed out (valid reasons),

and it was snowing...
and my sister and I started getting tired...
and the thought of staying in, warm and cozy,
sounded better than a 25-minute drive to a packed bowling alley.

But then I remembered this journey.

At first, we were all uninspired and low-energy,

and the 45-minute wait for a lane didn't help!

But then we got some food and pop (Caffeine!!) and the games began.

It was a so fun! We ended up bowling for two hours

(I realized I had a coupon for 6 people, $24.99=2 hrs of bowling, shoes, and a pitcher of pop!)

and talking about the Lord the whole time.
It was fun, encouraging, AND,
I got my 2nd highest bowling score EVER... 151!
Not great, but hey, I never claimed to be  professional bowler
One friend commented during the night that I had so much energy,
and I realized she was right.

All it took was a choice to be with people and have a good time.
Needless to say, my caffeine intake kept me up way past bowling.
My light went out a little past 2:30a.m.

Lesson: just go--you WILL have fun!

Day 97 Feeling Thanksgivingy?

Today?
Meet new people!
I got invited to a Thanksgiving party
(of people I don't really know)--
and went.

The block was full of cars,
both sides of the road,
and the big house was full of chatter and laughter.
It was the young adults' group from my friend's church.
I met a lot of new people,
stuffed myself,
played some pool,
and was joyfully social.
It was fun to get dressed cute,
and enter a new world of people.
You have to try this!

And, get this:
the house we went to is known for its Christmas decorations!
They put a carousel on the roof and everything!
The house wasn't decorated yet,
but he showed us a picture
(it was published in a book)
and told us that they won a trip to the Bahamas because of it!
How cool is that?

Lesson: you never know who you'll meet!

Day 68 Party Crashers

Today?
I crashed a party!

Well, kind of...

I was in Milwaukee, visiting Jill.

I invited us along to a BARN DANCE!

Yes, you read that right.

I have two other friends in Milwaukee,

and their church was having a chili cook-off and barn dance.

I had even packed a flannel shirt for Saturday's outfit,

not knowing the opportunity ahead...

Ironic?

I don't think so! ;)

(for you fashion experts--

it was one of those newly instyle flannel shirts)

So, we showed up at this rich person's house,

not knowing anyone,
to meet up with my two friends who were doing the chili cook-off...
The "barn" was this humungous shed,

and there were at least 100 people there.

Get this: they'd hired a professional squre dance "caller."

There was about 70 of us that danced the night away.

It was SO MUCH FUN!!!

I have not laughed like that in a really long time!

Lesson: dance like no one is watching!